funny how being mentally unstable can make you type weird stuff.





i really am, m.u.







i am dying for after-eights..the mint-filled chocolate thins.


and...vintage rings. scarves. the new lily allen album. oh wait,that's in feb,sry.





this is miserable.





and i'm not living the life of someone meant my age.





this is unfair.





call me simplistic for having such an attitude, but i have decided to go along with this part of the propaganda.





yes, i'm overworked.







looks like i'm buckling.





and jolene, this is for you.



'This is my blessing,
this is my curse.
but i don't care what it is,
as long as i'm with her."

no idea what it means. but i just said it on the spot.

Stayed over at school with my beloved friends for CCA Awareness Day, which finished ystd.



went home and came back to school (wonderful sun at that time!) at around 4.30 on fri, freshly bathed.



talked to jolene, trying to finish up the Groom My Room write-up (watch it on Okto, from 25th january, and vote for bukit view :) ) and talked to whoever was there.





bridget (!) deserted us, but bcos she was psl.







at night, some psls came to join us in the art room. at around 12 midnight-ish, nasri called a publications meeting and ordered everyone to finish their second newsletter articles b4 2.30. that is how we ended up staying late until 3...all the way until 7. i finished my articles (n level results and top 10 _that's a secret!____ of 2008) in a jiffy. i was quite proud of the both. i mean, i didn't expect to work that well. at that time, too.





i, for one, did not catch even an hour of sleep. it was only 20 mins. i slept on hard floor, cos the person next to me wouldn't relinquish his/her hold on the blanket. then i woke up, and started walking around. talking to ppl, asking them how they were. i mean, i scared the media crew guys that if they juts sat in the same place playing pet society and pretending to be zhe kai on msn, they would suffer from DVT and die quietly.





then went barefoot downstairs with jeremiah to look for smth. who could hate me that much to wish that i lost smth v.valuable? sigh.





watched the ring 2, or at least bits of it.

somehow i stayed alive. some people claimed two beanbags to themselves. zhe kai caught his beauty sleep and claimed the banana seat.

i didn't want to sleep cos i didn't want to oversleep and then upset my body clock. so i stayed up.

at around six, cheng ying and i were talking about music. i think. i can't really remember.


Missing you guys badly.







jolene,

thank you for accompanying me everywhere and keeping me sane, and for everything you've done for me. that's all crammed into a sentence, but it means a lot to lil ol' me.

love you lots.





basyar,

thank you for asking me how i was everytime,

for freaking me out

for making me laugh my life out

for the compliments

for everything i haven't thanked you for.





cheng ying,

thank you for introducing me to something called sla-----.

for the first time, i did.

thank you for talking to me in the mornings in a monotone and plotting to kick someone (did we really do that?)





same goes for bridget and iqbal and lia and azwan.



i will really miss you all of you guys.





god knows how much i want to be on stage.

i really do.

but it's just that i'm caught up with things.







it does suck to be me.

i mean, you could be wondering, how could she say that? she's got everything!!





truth is, the most successful people aren't necessarily the happiest.